As time goes by.....

Been throwing myself into anything and everything. Trying to not think about losing C. Her husband was here on boxing day. I wanted to be strong for him. Instead I cried in front of him.

I am 28 and this is the first time I've had to face losing someone I care about. I've led a sheltered life. I can't picture life without her in it. I think about visiting with B and going to their house. But if she were reading this she would tell me to think about visiting her because she has to believe in the possibility of life. I want to believe in the possibility of life too but I don't want to deny things either.

I'm just a friend and yet I can start to understand the fine line that she and her family have been walking for years now. I admire their courage. All of them. This must be incredibly hard.

Chin up for all of us. For now I'm here for her, for them in any way I can be.